I had an interesting conversation with my daughter, Bethany, the other day. Curious to know her response, I asked “Do you feel loved?”

Her response, “Yes and no…By family and those I am close to, yes, but not to people around me as a whole because people do not just come up and hug you.”

I probed a bit further and asked, “Aren’t there other ways to express love, like simply smiling at someone?”

“Yes,” she responded, “but not everyone does that, hardly anyone does that.”

I reflected for a few days on her answer, and I remembered a story from our past about a little, and I am afraid to say, very old lady who works at our local grocery store. Like others, I found myself avoiding her check out line, because she was terribly slow, often was confused leading to mistakes, and she was incredibly cranky.

In church, our pastor had just finished a series on blessing your neighbors and showing them God’s love. I cannot believe how convicting it was as I thought about this precious, little lady. I gave thought to her predicament of working long hours past the years she probably wished to be working only to have people be impatient with her, avoid her line, and show her no kindness. I observed this each time I went to the store and realized I was no better as I avoided her line in the rush to get home.

As Bethany and I finished our shopping one afternoon and approached the checkout, I said to Bethany, “Let’s get into her line and try to get her to smile.” We did not succeed that day, but as the weeks went by and we purposely checked out in her line, the smile came, then the conversation. What was hidden beneath frustration, weariness and anger at mistreatment was a sweet old woman just trying to make ends meet and get through her day. A smile, which was all it took – a smile that conveyed Jesus’ love and made her day.

In his gospel, Luke writes:

“But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also, and from one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic either. Give to everyone who begs from you, and from one who takes away your goods do not demand them back. And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.” (Luke 6:27-31)

My thoughts went back to Bethany’s comment “Hardly anyone does that.” Yet, clearly in this passage, believers are called to be different. We are to show love to those who are unkind to us, respond well when people are cruel, impatient, angry, and disrespectful. We are to pray for those who may cause us harm, who cheat or steal from us. We are to show love, grace, and kindness even when the response to that remains unkind.

Many religions and philosophies teach that we are to do unto others as we would have them do to us, but what if we treated others the way they would want to be treated even if they do not respond that way in return? Do not treat others with love and kindness just so they will treat us the same way in return; instead, show them the love of Jesus regardless of what their response may be. Show them Jesus. God’s love is marked in the life of a believer not only by how they act toward others, but also by how they react to what others do, even when the reaction is unkind.

Now, in no way do I consider our little checkout lady my enemy. I would like to say the smiles we shared changed her or at least changed her day. Maybe. I realize more and more how it changed me. I took my eyes off myself and looked into the heart needs of another. Sometimes taking a moment to look past a gruff and nasty exterior and showing the love of Jesus will lead to a softening of their heart to actually see Jesus.

Have you had an opportunity to show your difference? Your smile, your kind word, your peaceful reaction to genuine unkindness may be all it takes to show the difference of Jesus in your life and plant a seed of God’s love in someone’s heart. Whether an enemy or not so much, show them Jesus. Show them love because every believer does that, or at least is supposed to.